Compliant. Complacent. Committed? Which am I?

I had the pleasure of turning fifty this past week, with Easter being two days later, and it made me think about 'habits', as I was Chatting with someone on facebook about their Passover meals and why they don't change what they serve in accordance with what they know are the foods that are contributing or causing health problems.  My own family has, over the last fifteen years since I had IgG food allergy testing done, realized that they were also not good with wheat, and they have completely removed wheat from their eating, even on holidays. 

I remember how compliant I was in my 20s, when I'd gained weight for the first time, which was probably one of my first or 15th symptoms that I and my doctors didn't recognize and test properly for thyroid I'm guessing.  On my own thought 'if I just eat protein and vegetables, that seems like it would work' and so that's what I did. No cheating, no problems, I just did it.  And the pounds dropped away, I started feeling really good and I never suspected it was because I took wheat out of my diet which might have been causing a lot of problems within my body that ended up like a cascade of dominoes.  I'd had a very bad blood sugar problem when I was in my teens, as my dad did as well, and maybe I learned how to be compliant from him, as if he buys into something then he was very dedicated to doing things right. 

Ten years later when my health had been up and down over and over and then it went very badly, appearing to be MS for a while, I remember the time in the MRI where they were having to go get the IV team to come do contrast and light something up, so I knew they saw something, where I was 'bargaining' and saying 'I'll do anything if it's not MS'.  So when I finally found the alternative MD expert who figured out the food allergy thing with me and it was 'just' a matter of not eating dairy and wheat, I was FINE with that!  And I was compliant.  

I think it's harder to be compliant the longer you have something in a way.  I sometimes have the feeling like 'I do all this and all the better I am is THIS?  Give me a cookie.'    But when you structure yourself to look at what all you HAVE, and keep looking at where you want to go, it is much more possible.  I find it helpful to look back, as I then can say 'oooh, I never want to feel like THAT again', and just keep it present in mind what the benefits are to leading my life the way I want to be, in terms of eating especially, since that's what I'm talking about today.  But these concepts apply to other things, as so many struggle with tobacco, both chewing and smoking, alcohol, prescription drugs used legally, illegally (what I understand to be called 'Pharmies', and recreational drugs. 

What motivates YOU ... wanting to be where you envision yourself or NOT wanting to be where you are or were?  Or are you subconsciously getting what is called 'secondary gain' from having a problem and so you're not really REALLY trying to solve it?  It is very complicated I think, so I hope this has made you think a bit.  

As a resource, I want to give you a link to something someone wrote on Lumigrate that helped remind ME of how much more enthusiastic I used to be, written by Alice in 'Life is Good with Alice' Forum under spirituality, so I hope you read and are inspired if you need or want. 

www.lumigrate.com/forum/lent-over-lifesytle-changes-made-during-lent-can-last-lifetime